Friday, July 9, 2010

PartI- When the spirit is stronger

Our clinical teacher sat at the head of the table, with a list of the day's patients in hand. She's a slow talker allowing us ample time to make the decisions we need.
"Room 94 is a burn patient. Who wants a burn patient?"
She scanned the table, looking at the 10 of us. We returned her look with blank stares. I wanted to want to say I'd take him but I was scared.
"90% of his body..." she mumbled.
I wasn't interested.
"Okay..." she said "moving on. We have encephalopathy in the room next door. Encephalopathy anyone?"
We aren't trying to be cruel- but if the patient's heard the way we chose them in the morning like items off a menu they may take offense. Which is exactly why we do this in private, with the door closed. It isn't mean, I remind myself, it's efficient.
"I'll take the encephalopathy." someone said.
"Okay, done." She crossed the name off the list. "Next is... multiple trauma. Anyone want a multiple trauma?"
Multiple trauma was claimed quickly.
"So about the burn patient- no one wants him?" she asked again.
One of my classmates said "I'll take him, but I'm leaving the floor early so I don't know if thats a good idea."
I sensed an internal nudge, so I went with it.
"I'll be here all day" I said "I'll take him."
"Okay Kacie, go ahead and take him."
Deep breath. What had I gotten myself into? Today was going to be difficult.
I remember going on an RV trip with my mom and dad (when they were still together), my brother and sister when we were very young. We may have taken a vacation to some theme park, or a water park, or i really don't know. All I remember from that journey was watching my mother read a newspaper article about 2 young children who got caught in a house fire. The story spread across the page with their before and after pictures. I remember standing at the foot of the RV wondering what was wrong with my mom. Maybe she had been crying? I remember her petting my soft cheeks and telling me she loved me and she was so thankful for us and our life. I asked her what was wrong but she didn't really say. I snuck in to the RV to look at what she was reading and I never forgot.
Being burned may be among one of the top most devastating injuries a human could have to endure. And hearing stories of people being burned hit me on that level where humor, peace, and fairness don't reside. This however, is not a sad story... this is a story of witnessing when the spirit is stronger than the body- a story of hope- of resilience- of beauty.

to be continued...

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