i'm armed, with a gift and a needle!

i returned to the village, from cameroon, on a friday. it was nice to be back.

fridays. the day the village heart beats strong, pumping it through another sleepy week, feeding it through another hungry week, allowing for a little madness and an open door to stay and dance before it all dies down.

this friday also happened to be the baby clinic, when the health center floods with rolls of pudgey month old fat, gurgling and spitting and screaming from injections.

i couldn't have picked a better day to arrive, and... experience had me prepared.

'kessy!' people said when i arrived 'wakwaaba kessy, how was cameroon?'

'cameroon was wonderful.' i replied. and i meant it the way kingsley refers. full of wonder.

'oh that is fine, fine. and your family? how is your family?'

'my family is doing just fine, thank you.'

'oh that is good, good. and...'

the question i was waiting for, the question history had taught me to expect...

"what did you get me from cameroon?"

judi had sent me away, boarded me onto the plane with a bag full of presents, had stuffed them into my bags the very last second she could. "take these to your friends in the village" and i gladly accepted. i needed something to combat the onslaught of requests with.

i came to cameroon with one backpack, and left with two- both stuffed.

bag one: my things.

bag two: other people's things.

but before i left the house to go to work i scrambled through my unpacking and realized i had forgotten Ma. how had i forgotten Ma?

i looked at a few of the dresses that i might not ever wear outside of Africa. they were good looking, and easily disposable, but they were small. and Ma is not small. i sifted through my other belongings, most of which didn't suit her character.

just as i began to fret sofie came to my rescue with a bead necklace from Hand in Hand.

"do you mind?" i asked, relieved.

"no, not at all. take it."

if anyone understood, it was sofie. she is just becoming aquainted with this peculiar practice. "it's really fucking annoying." she says. "and they do it all the time!"

but i was quite excited for what was about to come, because i had my bag full of goodies, along with Ma's "cameroonian" bead necklace, and i was ready to GIVE!

the first coworkers i saw were Efreeyeh and Secetry, standing together outside the dispensary.

"GOOD MORNING!" i yelled, and they both turned to look.

"Kecieeeeeeee!" secetry screamed, laughing and bending down towards the ground in an emotional bounce. "wakwaaba!"

and the typical greeting followed, along with the questions, and then...

i interuppted. "wait! no- no- before you say anything else, i have something for you both. okay are you ready?" i was tempted to play a childish gift giving game and make them guess what i was about to adorn them with. "okay..." i said, searching through my bag.

i found the hat for efreeyeh and secetry's bracelet. if they didn't like them, too bad, i had carried them from cameroon with love in my heart, and that should be enough.

"okay this is for you secetry" handing him the grass woven bracelet, "and efreeyeh i brought you back... this!" i swung the hat around and stuck it on her head. she was laughing at me the entire time, the 'you are ridiculous but i love you anyway' laugh, and then she removed the hat.

"see the fabric sewn on the front?" i asked "that is the International Women's Day fabric. everyone in cameroon was wearing it on International Women's Day. i marched in a parade with that hat! you should feel honored to even put it on your head!" then i gave her a nice firm slap.

"okay" she said "it's nice. thank you."

the way she was looking at it, like a parent admiring their offspring's finger painting, proved she really did like it.

i think.

secetry couldn't get his bracelet on, but that didn't curb his enthusiasm... "oh kecciee, you brought me this from cameroon? oh i thank you. yes, yes, i thank you. ai!" he said, stressing the "too" "you are too nice." he was trying to squeeze it on past the wide part of his hand, but it wouldn't budge. "oh, i think it is too small. but, i thank you. ai! cameroonian girl!"

kingsley and watchman heard the jubilating and appeared from around the corner. "wakwaaba!" they both said, and then i handed them their gifts, jewelry the same as secetry's. "thank you thank you." they both said, genuinely touched.

4 down half a village to go.

i couldn't find vera, so i decided to enter Ma's space and devote some time to her. i know she'd want more than a quick good morning.

when i walked through the screen door and saw her sitting behind her desk i let out a long happy "GOOD MORNING MA!" to which she jumped out of her seat and ran out to hug me.

"ooohhhhh Kaisy!!!!!!! welcome welcome welcome. i've been missing you too much! oh kaisy!"

it was a short hug, very authentic, and rumpled, like the last minute in a dryer full of towels. but my favorite part was it ended in a million little kissy noises... something i found strange coming from her.

she's good at surprising me.

"oh kaissy sit down. sit down." then she retired to her spot. "how was cameroon?" "and your family?"

great. superb.

"oh that is nice" she said. "it is good you've come safely, by God's grace."

"yes, by God's grace."

i was looking her straight in the eyes, willing her to ask me what i brought for her.
she didn't pick up on any of my signals so i offered myself up. "well, i brought you a little something" then, a lie and an embellishment upon that lie "from cameroon. i went to the market and i was thinking of you, i thought, i wonder what i can get Ma? then i remembered you loved my beads like these, but you wanted them in black. they didn't have black so i got the closet shade, this blue. i hope you like them." i said handing them over, quickly tearing off the homemade price tag in Cedis, and feeling sneaky and proud of it.

"oh Kaisy. thank you. you remembered."

she held the beads like they were her first experience with a baby chick. "how do i put them on?" she asked.

"there is a clasp here" i pointed, realizing it would be too small for her to see. "you can undo it and wrap it once, like this... or twice like this!"

when i modeled she laughed. "oh Kaisy.. i was missing you."

"i missed you too." i said. then i added "it looks like they're setting up for the baby clinic today?"

"oh yes. yes."

"okay, then i'll be outside most of the day, helping them with that. okay?"

"oh no problem at all. feel free." she said.

************************

a very heavy downpour had happened in the early morning, enough to leave ant-sized lakes resting in the center of each leaf balancing above our heads. each time the wind blew, a mother or a baby or a health worker or i would get a momentary jolt along with a 2 second shower.

there wasn't any where else for the clinic to take place, and attendance was going to be high. the benches were already full. so we stayed put.

"let's begin, shall we?" the head of the baby clinic asked. he's the man, about my age, who seems like he'll do a lot for ghana. "can you do the opening prayer for us?" he asked, turning to me.

"sure," i glanced around. soley village women. "but i can only do a small part of it in twi. i like to talk to god in english, he gets me more."

"ha ah, oh okay, go right ahead, however you please."

"okay. then. let's pray. Yedaase Onyame for gathering us here, hyira obiaa, ne let us bless you also. amen."

"AMEN!"

when i was through with the prayer i felt a surge rush through me. a surge of power and confidance. a surge of boldness.

i looked around.

i saw plenty of babies, waiting to be vaccinated, and i knew at that moment who was going to do it.

i was ready. i was ready to stick people with needles, and feel strong about it.

i had spent a few hours in the airport with a needle and syringe, practicing mock situations, shooting my backpack up with imaginary medicine. "somebody needs to help this woman quick! does anyone know how to inject?" i'd plunge it in to the bottom heavy part of my bag, the part that felt most like a butt cheek. "he's here for his yellow fever vaccination. Ms. Mutscheller, can you take care of this please?" i'd pierce my strap at a 45 degree angle, pleased with my placement and efficiency.

i can do this, i decided. and i threw the needle away.

now i was sitting on a small wooden stool, staring out at all my victims. but first, i had to ask.

"um" i said, already not sounding very convincing "so whose going to be giving the vaccinations today?" i asked my friend.

"why do you ask?" he said, smiling devilishly.

"because i want to do them."

"then you can do them, it's no problem at all."

"or maybe not "them", maybe just "one". okay?"

"yes, no problem."

"really? but i've never done one before." i could have added, on a real human being.

"it's simple. you can watch me then take it from there."

"okay, sounds good."

the babies were waiting, happy and oblivious. "actually" i said "i'll just do the first one. i can do it. i've practiced a lot."

the way i had turned this into the event of the century was making my friend laugh. i was nervous, and kept going back on my original decision. like trying to call a crush.

but when kofi oburoni was the first baby to appear, i was certain i was going to do it. i care for him, and feel very close to him. why not administer his health care too?

"he's getting darker" i told his mother, "and he's growing, look at him!" two weeks gone and he was plumpening up. then i lifted up his shirt to see if his breasts had dissappeared. he had developed miniature boobies, hard and round, like a baby pamela anderson. when i first saw them i silently freaked out. then i brought him to Maame Vic. she and sofie explained this was a normal condition, it would dissapear, but that yes, they were startling.

"oh good, no more boobies." that was definately not professional.

Sister Yaa laughed and looked at me confidantly. i had helped her in the delivery room, i'm certain she had no idea this was my first time injecting somebody. being aruond her made me feel confident, so i took the needle and slid it into her baby's thigh, then pulled it back out.

just how i imagined. like an unripe mango.

i dabbed the area with a white cotton ball, the way a professional would do it, except they don't write chapters recounting what they would consider mundane details.

kofi oburoni let out a huge scream, that wiggled out and, then up, flying away into the sky. it was so loud i could see it and had to clear the area with my hand like it was a bad smell.

"how was that? that was my first shot! i did my first shot!" a little high from the experience.

"you've done well. you've done well." my friend said. "you can go write it in your diary now!" he said, joking, but propheticallly.

"advice?"

"yes. next time, try to do it a little faster. it will be less painful for the child."

"okay. got it. NEXT!"

the babies came, and i shot. it was a day of breaking through my fears, and i felt great. more than great. i had to tell everyone.

i ran into Ma's office, where she and Efreeyeh were soaking in plastic from the chairs.

"Ma! guess what! and Efreeyeh, ha. you'll never believe it." my fervor startled them into opening their eyes full moon. "I AM OFFICIALLY, NO LONGER, AFRAID OF INJECTING! march 15th, 2007. write it down because i know how to give shots!!!"

then i jumped all around the office and wiggled my butt. "oh ya oh ya"

"somebody get me a needle, i'm going to shoot your leg Efreeyeh, so you can experience my experience! oh ya oh ya!"

she pulled away from me and told me good job. Ma shook my hand. "oh kaisy! you have done well! by all means you will deliver the next baby. you can take the next case. you are ready."

i liked the jump from a simple shot to being a midwife.

i ran out over to Maame Vic's office. "nice work" she said "it's difficult. the first time vera went to give an injection i told her to "BE BOLD" because she was fearing."

"you had to tell vera to be bold?"

"YES!" she said.

i ran over to the dispensary with my announcement and vera laughed. then i retorted "you're only laughing because you know how it feels to ffeeaar the innjeection. you know how good it feels to bring the boldness! huh? huh! Maame Vic told me, don't try to act sly. you had to bring the boldness too!"

"ha ha, you brought everybody else presents from cameroon and nothing for me?" was her response.

i opened my bag and threw her a hat. "women's day." i said "hope you like it!"

then we slapped hands and i went back out to the babies. a lady came into Ma for a depo injection.

who'ya gonna call?

KACeJectors!

i was summoned, so i went in and stabbed her arm, quickly, then went back out.

by the time the day was through i was completely needle happy. i practically went for myself. when i went to bed that night i couldn't stop imagining the sensation, of pointy point meeting solidness, or the surprise look on all my friend's faces when i gave them their gift before they had a chance to ask.

i really was learning things.

it made me grit my teeth, and smile.

cameroon

cam tales will continue, whenever they emerge. the trip has passed and i am back in the village... so...