happy bervday

i didn't want to be dissapointed when my birthday came around, so instead, i made preparations for myself. 3 days before, when i was in kumasi, i took my first trip in over 6 months inside a grocery store. the choices were too numerous i didn't know what to do, so i grabbed a COLD! bottle of chocolate soymilk and a packet of cookies labeled "American Style Brownie Cookies" with a picture that looked delicious. i hoped the image of the chocolate chunks poking out of the tops of the cookies wasn't lying to me.

"this should do." i told myself.

my birthday would be celebrated, no matter what. even if no body in the village remembered, i would have 16 brownie cookies to keep me company. the chocolate soymilk was consumed while i waited in line. i missed waiting in grocery store lines.

i returned to the village just as the sun was setting. sofie was sitting on the porch, drawing her feet, she looked up.

"hello!" she said cheerfully.

"hiii..."

"you're back!"

"yeah."

"well i'm just sketching my feet" she laughed "it's friday night you know? we should go out!"

we both laughed at the idea, knowing full well there wasn't really any where to go. our new favorite game was to talk of impossibilies in a realistic way.

"where do you want to go?" i asked.

"anywhere really. we could go salsa dancing..." she kept drawing and thinking.

"dancing sounds fun, but i kind of want to watch a movie. let's go to the movies!"

"ohhhhhh- a film! wouldn't it be great to watch a film? it's a bugger i didn't get my mom to bring us over any, but i guess we'd need electricity..."

my arms were full of bags, i motioned to them, "i'm gonna go inside and drop these off... i'll be back out..."

i went to my room and unloaded my goods. the rainy season had displaced the ants, and now they were streaming around my walls in tidy delicate lines. i knew i had to hide my precious cookies far away from where they marched. the bag wasn't open but i didn't doubt their capabilities, so i stuck the sweets in a plastic bag and hung the bag around a hanger, then put the hanger in the back of my wardrobe.

i went outside, laid my cloth next to sofie, and took in the last few moments of light.

"so" i said "what did you do today?"

"ahhh? saw some patients, taught a lesson, came home, sat here... it's been a bit slow really."

i liked seeing sofie relaxed, it was unusual.

"who's inside?" i asked, two voices were making their way through the walls out to us. "sounds like they're fighting?"

our 4 ears perked up and we listened intently, then we looked at each other. "auntie is yelling at someone, let's go see who it is."

the difference between this sound and all the others, was that the person was yelling back at auntie. when i walked around the corner i went straight into my room, immediately embarrassed to be in caught in the middle. it was auntie and seth, screaming at one another. i didn't turn around to see where sofie was, but i heard her bedroom door close.

the fight was directly outside my door. auntie was barking at seth accusing him of sneaking around, lying about where he says he goes. seth was yelling back telling her he is an honest man, if he says he's going into town, that is where he will go.

i didn't understand why they were fighting about something that seemed so mundane, but i was sure it wasn't just that. any way, i felt cooped up, so i took a deep breath, opened my door, and scurried over to sofie's room. i noticed sakola was now involved, holding back skinny seth from going after his mother.

it was a regular african jerry springer. my sister would have loved it.

"what's the matter? why are they fighting in english? how bizarre..." sofie asked, when i reached her hideout.

"i'm not entirely certain..."

we stayed put, sofie resting on her bed, and me resting my ear against the door trying to work out all the details, until i was sure it was all over. when we emerged, both seth and auntie had packed up and left the house. i went outside, sakola was walking the length of the porch, back and forth back and forth.

"sako!?"

"akua."

"they're gone?"

he laughed.

i ran back inside, told sofie. "they've left!"

i know that sofie likes auntie, all but her singing at 4 every morning.

"dance party!" i yelled.

sofie grabbed her hand powered long wave radio from atop her window and spun the handle around about 20 times, then put it down. "really let's do a salsa lesson. highlife is nice music to salsa to... i'll teach you."

we spent the next hour in her room while i struggled trying to learn how to move my ribs. "it's really not the most important part" sofie said, while hers were moving around in perfect circles "it's this step right here..."

sakola peeked his head in the room and made fun of me. "akua, is no correct, heeeeyyy."

i didn't like somebody commenting on my imperfections, esp. while i was trying to learn. "why don't you come and try to do it, stop staring!?"

about every 8 minutes or so, the radio would lose power and one of us would have to grab the handle and crank it till it had enough juice to give us another session.

"i'm hot man! let's go out on the porch." she said.

we took the radio outside and put it on the ground. Cheif, my ghost roommate who i now have quite a strange connection with, walked over to our music and switched the station... to talk radio, in twi.

i ran after him and threatened to beat him up, he grabbed the stereo and ran away from me like a little boy, laughing through his nose and choking on the excitement of possibly being caught.

"cheif we want highlife, put it back on highlife!"

eventually he did, but the salsa lesson was over. i couldn't bear having the boys watch every move i was learning, then comment on my inability. cheif was finding too much pleasure in it. so instead, i danced my way, kacie way, with spins and kicks and wiggles. sofie claims i have rhythmn, and i do, but not the kind that can be harnassed into the precision of a salsa move. sakola liked this new dancing better. "is good" he said nodding "is good. i'm like it."

the night was perfect. the energy from town could be felt, it was busteling but far away, and our porch scene was full of life. i was coming up with some pretty outrageous moves i had never tried before, even jumping up and hugging one of the big thick columns on the porch. it feels good to hug columns.

sofie mentioned earlier that she feels more like a kid now than she ever has.

i had to agree.

"we are constantly having to find ways to keep ourselves busy. i'm really keen on inventing entertainment." she said.

and it was true, each day we had successions of big round hours. all these big round hours were plump with nothing to do. we had to squeeze the life out of them. at times, it was tedious, being confronted with an afternoon's blank agenda, but, it eventually gave way to a million and one little acts of creation. and creating is fun.

we were constantly trying to find ways to keep ourselves engaged. sometimes, one of us would think of something absolutely brilliant, something that could fill at least a few hours.

this last week we had already created an obstacle course complete with buckets of water and a homemade jump rope, learned important facts about one anothers countries (one including Manchester is the new unofficial gay capital of England), verbally recited our favorite recipes, and manually spell checked sofie's journal.

"you're birthday is on sunday." sofie said, as she moved in the dark to the music.

"i know..."

"what do you want to do?"

"i don't know..." i kept dancing.

i couldn't invest any thought at that moment, all i could say was "i bought some cookies. brownie cookies."

i heard her appreciate the comment with a little moan, and the night went on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i wrote in my journal,

tommorow, i will be 26.

just to remind myself.

then i planned the day as follows.

1. sleep in past 4 a.m..

i knew this would be easy now that auntie wasn't around and i was looking quite forward to it, which is why i was a little pissed off when the knock on my door woke me from a wonderful slumber. i looked at the clock, it was just about to be 6. i got up and opened the door to see sakola standing in front of me, smiling and staring. "akua, the builders are here." he pushed his arm opening my door, motioning his finger around my room. "you have to pick this up."

i glared at him, then recited- i am in control of my attitude. i am in control of my attitude. i am in control of my attitude.

it wasn't helping. i didn't appreciate being woken up and then told to clean my room. and before i knew it, i had strange men trampling around measuring and grunting and carrying tables into my space.

is being overprotective of one's privacy a sin?

"okay let me just move my mattress" i said, bending over and trying to move it out of the way. i wasn't sure what these guys were doing, something along the lines of window dressing. curtains wouldn't be a bad thing, i told myself, they would keep Cheif from constantly peering in. i tried to see the positive, because i knew i wouldn't be getting back to bed.

then sofie walked in with one of my market bags in her hand. it was full, and she plopped it down in front of my feet. "happy birthday." she said. "do you like the gift wrap?"

i unveiled my present in her room, slowly, with much delight.

on the top was a journal. inside the journal was a step by step guide, drawn and watercolored and easy to understand, of our daily yoga routine, so that i wouldn't forget it when she wasn't around.

just as my name is akua kessywa, she has also been named Yaa Sophia (so-fy-yah) Fire. on top of the paper said "Yaa Sophia Fire's Training" in bright red.

behind sofie's training manual, was another beautiful watercolor she had done of a view of the maternity center.

"your life!" she said, humbly admiring her work from a distance.

it was the best present, and i wanted to hug her but we didn't really have the hugging type of relationship.

"thank you, so much." i said.

"keep going..."

i reached down and pulled out a bag of dried fruit, the kind her mother had brought from london. packages of snacks, esp. fruit, were more precious than gold. i could barely believe she'd give up an entire thing.

"sofie!"

i felt greedy getting more. i wanted to stop, she urged me to continue.

i pulled out a radical pair of dangly earrings, something she found at the local market. i loved them. they were coppery gold and looked like the scales of a fish falling from my earlobe.

she gave me her english-twi dictionary which was much more expanded and detailed than mine. she was certain i'd get more use out of it, and i was instantly looking forward to all the words.

"i hope they fit" she said, as i pulled out a pair of jeans, something we both had spent hours talking about in the past few months. it was frivolous talk, of how we missed slipping ourselves into our favorite jeans, and walking around in weather that was cold enough for them. if it was imperative i would be able to sew her jeans from back home, stitch by stitch. i know them that well.

i ripped off my shorts and put them on. they pinched my waist, gave me a cameltoe, and went up to my ankles. "ohh sofie! you shouldn't have! i love them!"

it wasn't even 7 in the morning and it was already a great birthday.

everyone had planned a delicious dinner, my favorite ghanaian meal of boiled plantain and garden egg stew.

sofie and i spent the morning outside. i couldn't decide whether or not to go to church. "i'm spiritually starving." i said, as i looked up at the sky. i missed my church back home, i missed being in community with people who truly understood me. i didn't want to sit through another sermon in twi, and strain to understand.

"how about you give me a sermon here?" sofie asked.

i agreed, and told stories of the times God has answered my prayers in incredible ways, of times when Grace had never been more clear.

"this is great!" sofie said "i'm doing things here i've never had the time to do at home. i keep telling myself i want to be more spiritual."

initially i felt a little nervous because from what i've gathered sofie is very turned off by christianity. i can see why. but there is the other side, the beautiful side, and i wasn't sure if i could illuminate it the way i know it. our morning on the porch was stimulating and i believe it revived us both.

we helped sakola and his mother farm in the afternoon, by gathering and carrying huge baskets of cocoa on our heads. we were depositing them in a head high pile which would be harvested the next day. every time i passed sakola, he'd smile big and say "akua! happy bervday!" and i'd keep walking by him, focused and glad to have him notice.

after bathing back home, my old friend Osmand stopped by to say hello. he was casually carrying a big white chicken by it's legs. it looked paranoid.

"kacie- hello. i've stopped by but haven't met you in a long time. i brought this for you." he handed it over to me.

i was excited, but still, i didn't want to touch it.

"a chicken! osmand!"

he wiggled it a bit, he wanted me to take it.

"thank you! here, let's put it over here." i hurried him over to a corner where he tossed the chicken. "wow, thanks. nobody had ever given me a chicken before."

we sat and caught up with each other. he let me know how the Muslim soccer team was doing, since i hadn't been playing with them. i told him to tell the guys' i say hello.

"so, about the chicken. i guess i have to kill it to eat it huh?"

it was a stupid question, which is why i hate it when i hear some people say 'there are no stupid questions.'

"will you be able?" he asked.

"no. i can't kill that chicken. look at him? his little glassy eye all freaked out. osmand! i can't even look at him all tied up like that, it makes me feel wierd."

"sakola can do it for you."

"but what happens if i need to MOVE the chicken?"

he looked at me and laughed.

"i know" i said "can you just bring it over here into sakola's room and we'll keep it in there until he comes home?"

sofie yelled "not in sakola's room, it will shit everywhere!"

i kept going "ya, bring it in here, we'll shut the door, perfect."

the chicken was crumpled in a corner close to sakola's bed. he would know how to handle it. i didn't want to touch it's feet, all leathery and waxy.

we ended up moving it a few more times, and its final destination was underneath a wicker basket on madame's porch, where it would suprise them all.

my birthday had turned out to be a huge success, in a different sort of way. all these people i loved were showing me love with chickens and jeans and smiles.

we went to madame's house to eat dinner. i had just learned the twi word for "gift" a few days before. i asked them if they saw the "akyedee" we left them on the porch and they all were thrilled. "tommorow you can kill it." madame said, knowing how i would react. "sofie wants to." we looked over at her and she didn't know what we were talking about. "you see? she isn't protesting." i said. Collins laughed.

NanaKwame and Sakola took a bicycle into town, loaded the basket with soda and beer, and came back to distribute. sakola was intent on drinking beer. i liked his resolve, it was unlike him. i joined in, loving every sip of my birthday beer, it's warmth and all.

just before sunset, i thanked the family for cooking my favorite food and singing me happy bervday, and went down to the clinic with sofie to visit our other people.

kingsley, his wife, and daughter, along with Ma's housegirl Gladys were relaxing on benches outside the clinic, watching the sky go from pink to orange to yellow. they had a stereo blaring ripe african beats. the wind was blowing warmth in whirlpools all around my body and face and we all got the urge to dance, so that is exactly what we did, till dark.

i went to the houses behind the clinic, greeted vera, efreeyeh, and Ma, and answered their questions with 'it's been a wonderful day'. efreeyeh was braiding Watchman's first wife's hair.

"happy berthday akua." she said.

"efreeyeh, since today is my birthday and all, i am going to ask just one favor."

she twisted the hair into tight antenaee around the woman's head. "what is it."

"i need a little boneshakin'"

"eih! akua. okay." she let go of the strand and backed up a bit. she bent her knees, made her elbows go alert, and shimmied her waist around. "boneshaker!" she said.

i clapped.

"thank you, thank you. now i must be going, it's dark already."

i ran out of her compound, met up with sofie and we went home.

"don't you kind of like the way they all say bervday?" i mentioned, on our way back.

"ya, it's just nice that they all noticed. i was wondering how today was going to go. did you have a nice time?"

"yes, i did." "i'm excited to be 26."

"good."

"and i'm excited about those brownie cookies..."

"yaaaa..."

"and about our chicken dinner tommorrow night..."