auntie unravels

"africans are really moody." sofie mentioned, as we were walking across the courtyard into our house. i wasn't sure why she thought that and i was finding her perceptions to be quite different than mine. "sakola in particular."

i took a moment to reflect on sakola's moods, which had seemed to be either hot or cold since sofie arrived, but i knew where they were stemming from.

"well sakola has been a bit moody, but there is a lot going on in his life right now. i think it's affecting him."

"like what?" she asked.

"auntie, mostly, and a few other added pressures."

"what's aunties problem?"

in the past few weeks it seemed she had a bundle load. each night we came home to her walking in little circles, mumbling her worries and complaints out to the universe. then the moment she spied sakola she'd reel him in with her sticky tentacles and chew him out for hours regarding things made up or having nothing to do with him.

"what has sakola done to auntie? she's quite difficult isn't she?"

i wasn't sure if auntie wanted any of us around. her son was supposed to be staying for a few days, and his visit was lasting weeks. the first few days he arrived went great. we spent the long dark hours of the night sitting around the dining room table while he inspired me with long monologues of living life as a walking tabernacle of acceptance and love. he spoke of an earth permeated with the love of god, agape love, unconditional and unchanging. then he talked of inviting that love to live in oneself, to fill up on it and essentially overflow with it. "are you following me?" he'd continuously ask. i'd just nod, waiting to hear more.

i really loved those late night chats, and my heart began to open up to him and feel glad we were sharing a living space.

but as the days grew on, seth became more and more antisocial. to deal with his strange behavior i was forced to make believe elaborate stories. i settled on this rough version:

him coming to visit his mother for his last few days on earth after finding out he only had a short while to live, less than a week. in that time he shone with gratitude and a deep inner peace, the way i imagine some people close to death might be. but as time passed, and he was still alive, he began to grow bitter and confused, just spending the days waiting to die, pissed off that he hadn't. and if he was planning on accomplishing anything in his final days, it was to convince his foreigner roommate he secretly could be a psychopath waiting for the perfect time to commit his strange crime that had everything to do with her.

because of this, i started to ignore him, which was easy, considering he stopped paying me any attention long before i had made up this decision, or this story. he and i were sharing a joint bathroom with a door that didn't lock. i set up secret traps to see if he was coming in my room when i wasn't there. i strung dental floss across the doorway in 3 places and shut the door. if i came home and any of my trap looked messed up or suspicious, i would have to confront the issue.

the floss never moved.

i didn't want him using my soap either, but continuously forgot it after bathing. when i'd remember the next morning i'd check it closely for dark curly hairs.

sofie was a little more proactive and practical. she used her medical expertise and some spare time and diagnosed him.

"oh he's harmless." she said, after i hinted at my suspicions. "he's just depressed."

"but you don't think he's dying of something terminal?" i said.

"no there is nothing the matter with him physically!" she said, a bit annoyed with his situation.

"then why is sakola doing everything for him?" that last saturday i was planning to go to town with sakola, and just as we were about to leave, seth walked into the kitchen and told us he wanted soup. sakola canceled our plans to spend hours making soup, then delivered it to his room, where it sat untouched until nighttime getting cold.

"because he's lazy." sofie said.

i still didn't believe her. something HAD to be the matter with him. he didn't eat, hardly slept, and spent long hours squatting in dark corners. it worried me. countless times i assumed i was alone, whether sitting on the porch looking at the stars, or in the living room stretching in the dark. eventually i'd hear a little cough. each time i wondered why he hadn't greeted me, and then i'd ask, a bit annoyed.

"oh i didn't see you there." he say.

i told sofie. "he said he doesn't see me there! how can he not, i'm less than 10 feet away from him! it's creeping me out!"

she thought about it and replied "maybe he doesn't see you there? severe depression can make you incredibly self-obsessed."

"but i called out in the dark asking if anyone was home. there is no way, he had to have seen me."

"yeah. huh?" she said. a few seconds later... "what was auntie screaming about last night?"

"she was mad at sakola because nanakwame left the gate open and the chicken got out and now it's gone. but i don't know why she was yelling at him."

"oh no." she said. "it was probably me. i leave the gate open all the time."

"we all do, nobody has ever told us to close it. and any way, i don't know why she cares, sakola was the one who bought the chicken."

later that night, sofie and i decided to go into town and get a drink. sakola came with us also, but ordered a coca cola classic. christians don't drink beer, he said.

it was about 8:30 when we all started to get tired. "let's go home" we decided.

when we reached our front door and pushed on it to get in, it was locked. sakola sighed, deep.

i pushed on the door again.

still locked.

"auntie." he said, shaking his head.

we peered through the window and saw the glow of a lantern. i was sure she was in there.

"call her to open the door for us." i said.

sakola called auntie's name a few times, but no response.

i was incredulous. she knew we were standing outside, waiting to come in. we could hear her breathing, raspy and hoarse.

"AUNTIE!" i yelled, loudly. "AUNTIE, we're hoooommmme!!!"

still nothing, so i kept at it. "AUNTIE!!! AUNTIE!!!"

then she interrupted me in twi, more upset than i had ever heard her.

sakola was sitting, listening to her rant, shaking his head between his legs. then she said in english "you can go find somewhere else to sleep. quit disturbing!"

i looked at sofie and then at sakola. was she serious? she wouldn't open the door for us? it wasn't yet 9 p.m., a seemingly acceptable time to come home before this night, and she was awake.

she was still going on in twi. "what is she saying?" sofie asked.

"she's saying she won't open the door for us, we have to go into town and find somewhere to sleep. collin's mother's house or something?"

i couldn't hold back. "auntie- this is our house. let us in! we pay rent here, we aren't going into town to sleep!" i hollered. i felt very american basing the argument off the fact that i paid to live there, but it was true.

sakola walked over to the window and took 5 minutes to convince her to open the door for us. she was reluctant and came out to the porch to finish us off with some more yelling. she was dressed in a blue pilots uniform, which only added to her absurdity.

"who is the one who speaks twi?" she asked sofie.

"i don't speak twi!" she replied.

so auntie came over to me and told me 9 was too late, she doesn't run a hostel, and we were causing her problems.

i didn't want to argue so i just listened and finished it by saying "yooooo" which means, okay. then she turned and went into the house.

i stayed outside for a lot longer, fearing her presence.

"you and sofie, when you go" sakola said "i'm moving. i won't stay here. in may, i'm moving."

"i completely understand." i said.

i looked at him and admired him in some ways; mostly for the graceful way he put up with auntie on a daily basis and for how he continuously helped seth out despite the circumstances. i vowed to learn a lesson from this, although i wasn't quite sure what exactly that would be.